As a rule I freakin’ hate musicals. They’re boring – packed with insincerity as bubbly people sing and dance about life’s miseries in an “it’ll be alright if we sing long enough” way. Fairy floss for the eyes and ears. I’d rather stick bamboo slivers under my nails than go to one.
My guilty secret though is that I did enjoy Pitch Perfect – the first one – a lot, and I am still partial to many of the classics – from Sound of Music to Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory or Jungle Book (the very hep 1967 version) and the Wizard of Oz.
I’ve walked out of Cats at the theatre after a mere 15 minutes of enduring the biggest pile of stink masquerading as live entertainment I’ve ever witnessed. In short, I’m like the King of Swamp Castle – if you break out in song part way through a movie, I’ll shut that down quick smart.
With all the buzz and quite a few “must see it” recommendations from my friends I thought I had better give La La Land a go. I regret to report that it only confirmed my preconceptions, in spite of the smouldering presence of Gosling and Stone – two of the most in demand and best actors around at the moment.
So what went wrong? Where do I start? Oh yes, the opening number.
Cheesy beyond all expectations. A pile-up of people in freeway traffic are happy to be stuck there, in spite of the horns klaxoning away. Brightly coloured, far too smiley, bright young things bound over cars singing weakly about nothing in particular. It’s only excuse for existing was to establish the one in a million coincidence of the two main characters meeting from having to sit through that bumph, oh and the traffic. I nearly left then.
Then it’s off to watch Emma Stone’s Mia and her classic rags to riches trajectory. The aspiring actor pulls coffees and flunks auditions. Her flat mates (who can only be known as Yellow, Red and Green because their function is to serve as colour contrast to Mia’s Blue), dance out of the house to meet a producer while Mia sits at home waiting for her next big audition.
Then yet more clichés as Mia and Seb (Gosling) meet again in another chance encounter. There are attempts to create chemistry but this is done through their acting, not their singing and dancing. It so could have been a non-musical screwball comedy.
Gosling’s jazz tragic works well, and the portrayal of his piano playing is great – I couldn’t see that it wasn’t him playing those riffs. His part of the story is significantly less fluffy than Stone’s as he wrestles with compromise and money – to pursue his love of opening a jazz club.
La La Land‘s musical number were pretty insipid to my ears and just emphasised something that had happened or nothing in particular. Most of the singers had quite weak voices with the only real exception being Ryan Gosling’s Seb singing City of Stars with Mia. That song at least had some emotional depth to it.
I think the film could’ve worked better without the bulk of the musical numbers. Stone and Gosling’s acting is far better than the musical interludes.
And the less said about the tap scene the better, other than it failed Tap Rule 1 – don’t do anything that reminds everyone of Shirley Temple unless you’re brilliant and tap dance full-time. I was embarrassed for them.
The fantasy visit to an alternative reality also served no real purpose. Giving them this too-long “what if” musical sequence did not resolve any of the questions it raised – why didn’t Seb follow Mia to Paris? Why couldn’t they make their relationship work? This is not Sliding Doors.
It also failed to explain what happened to the two. How did they get to where they ended up? Yes, you could fill it in from your own imagination, but it feels lazy and unfinished — there were so many opportunities to take this plot somewhere that were missed.
If I think back to those musicals I have really enjoyed, it’s these elements that shine through:
- Amazing songs that lift the film out of the ordinary – Somewhere over the Rainbow, The Candy Man, Sound of Music
- Great performances that add an extra element – Cowardly Lion in The Wizard of Oz, Gene Wilder in Willy Wonka, or Rebel Wilson in Pitch Perfect – each is a little out of kilter with your expectations for the movie as pitched, and extends your enjoyment.
- Songs that advance the plot in a meaningful way – they add something that is not necessarily repeated by the characters or take the action along.
- Often comedy is a big part of the enjoyment.
La La Land disappoints because it only has one of these four elements – great performances by strong actors.
The film is also quite sad and heavy which is not reflected in the music which is mostly “up” and light. Maybe it’s this failure to integrate these elements that makes La La Land such a missed opportunity. It feels like someone has taken the feel of Glee (which worked really because of the wickedness of so many of the characters) crossed with High School Musical to a producer and pitched it as a grown up version; but they missed the magic.
La La Land has great leads and a good plot outline and looks fabulous with its palette of bright primary colour but it failed to engage me. It doesn’t deserve the hype it’s been getting. ‘Ya gotta wonder sometimes – is the fawning simply because these two wonderful actors can actually sing and dance?
What were the Hollywood Foreign Press thinking? I know I’m in a minority, plainly, but surely there are others out there who have experienced this pain?
READ LUKE BACKMASTER’S 4 STAR REVIEW OF LA LA LAND HERE
